- January 28, 2009
- Posted by: Fola Daniel Adelesi
- Category: Uncategorized
How disheartening it is to note that of every 30 youths you scarcely find 2 who are being futuristic in their dealings and their approach to issues had better be imagined than described. Every one thinks about now and the instantly rewarding or seemingly satisfying actions.
What do you think about a situation where a lady forgets quickly that if she were impregnated by a fellow youth, she would be the one whose education would be terminated? Sex is as funny as being supposedly unfair to one of the parties involved because two parties are involved but the aftermath is only evident in one person.
Unfortunately there may not be enough evidence to hold a guy responsible, until the child is born, if the guy is not ready to own up. By implication you bear the shame and as if that is not enough you, who is still being catered for, would have to start catering for someone else if the family is not really buoyant.
Where this becomes particularly frustrating is where the young mother involved cannot get a noble job to take care of the infant. Three things can be envisaged when this is happening. The young mother, if not too mindful of reputation, can decide to stoop low, undertake any job just to make sure the child survives.
On the other hand, the young mother involved may delude herself by accepting that executive prostitution or the coded “pay as you go” is the only way out. Now she becomes more interested in money and less concerned about safe sex because what seems to matter more is the survival of the child. Money is necessary but it now exposes you to unprotected sex. Consequently, HIV/AIDS sets in and the problem you were trying to ameliorate is exacerbated.
I leave you to judge if this third thing that has been envisaged is worse or better than the aforementioned. She may not be ready to sail the sea before feeding the child especially when she is always finding herself in the assemblage of opportunists. What if she dumps the child in a pit or in a sewage system? Is this not the route of some of the babies that are picked up by scavengers? If the child manages to survive he would also have to start with a vague future because there is no one to turn to. There is the probability of a chain of confusion if the child also ends up in the hands of opportunists or becomes addicted to drugs.
I was racking my brain and something dawned on me. I may be involved in sexual intercourse and later part ways with the other party. Then I assumed that I became the Governor of my state and the same lady I had sexual intercourse with came back seeking a contract that she was not qualified to handle. You can be sure blackmail would follow if such proposals were turned down. That makes your integrity questionable, especially when the product of the ten-minute pleasure (baby) is still living.
You would begin to have problems with the people you were leading and the opposition party could capitalize on your moral failure. It would be rather unfortunate if you have been fond of some female friends, though with no sentiments, because it would be assumed that you have been spending the state government’s money on women since you have now become the Governor and at the same time the Minister for women affairs.
One of those interesting misconceptions that I have also come across is that some guys often say they have to do it so that she does not feel they are impotent. You owe nobody any obligation to prove that you are a man and that you are man enough to man anything that goes in skirts. It’s a little psychological. She wants a bit of your energy but she would not get it easily so she would use the syringe method. What’s the syringe method? She says something that is not true about you, especially as far as being “manly” is concerned and she wants you to prove her wrong not by words but by actions. She would tell you she believes what she feels!
Let anyone go to anywhere and say what he likes. If you do it once you would want another taste and when HIV/AIDS sets in would you still be proving you are not impotent? AIDS may not render you impotent but the fear of death can render you impotent so you end up becoming what you want to prove you are not. If only we think tomorrow and consider the relevance of our great dreams to the society, both in the local and international setting, you would always say to yourself that ABSTINENCE IS NOT IMPOTENCE.