- December 23, 2009
- Posted by: Fola Daniel Adelesi
- Category: Uncategorized
“I do not want to remember whatever happened because there is a winning that supersedes winning. It is the winning attitude. I believe you can bounce back from probation to ovation” Those were my words in ‘The Debaters’ TV reality show of Inspire Africa when I landed on probation in the 7th week of the show that was to last for 13 weeks.
Something in me was not accepting the fact that I could land on probation because I was trying to be very positive. On the other hand probation kept coming back as a thought so I decided to deal with it by preparing for what will happen after the probation if I ever landed on probation. I thought of a few things but more importantly I ‘prepared my attitude’ for that time of probation.
I eventually landed on probation when we had a debate on whether the population of Nigeria is a blessing or a burden. In my opinion I landed on probation because the judges didn’t like the fact that I had too many physical materials – props – to explain my points. For the most part, they came up with their comments and I prepared for the probation so when it came I was able to handle it very well.
Many of us are in a situation in our lives that we probably saw before it happened but we were trying to be very positive so we did not entertain the thoughts of those things happening. Recently I realized that being positive at times does not mean not entertaining some thoughts. Being positive in some contexts really means preparing your mind for the things you probably cannot change so that you will handle them well when they come!
It is important to be positive but don’t remain “negatively positive.” My idea of being negatively positive is to land into trouble because you were trying to reject something that was bound to happen rather than preparing for how you will handle it when it happens. In some cases I had rather prepare for an obvious trouble than trying to reject the trouble because when put in perspective the kind of trouble you are avoiding may just be what you need in life.
Being positive in some cases may mean not entertaining some thoughts but in some other cases it is about preparing for what can happen so that when it happens it will not put you off balance. There are situations that may make you feel like you are on probation. You may be on probation in your finances. You may be on probation in your relationships. You may be on probation in your academics. You may be on probation in your place of work. Your entire life may just look like probation.
As I told the presenter, ‘I don’t want to remember whatever happened.’ When we cultivate the habit of look forward to what will happen rather than focusing on what has happened we are most like going to become better people because of the attitude. A lot of people say life is hard but they still do not want to experience what is hard about that same life! What you need to do is to make your mind tough in preparation for a tough situation.
If you are prepared for the tough situation the reality is that you can bounce back with an ovation from the probation!