Depression in relationships | © Fola Daniel Adelesi

So many are in some funny relationships and for one reason or the other they just can’t explain why they are still in such relationships. You will be amazed at how many are in abusive relationships and are the ones defending the person abusing them. In marriages, women and men alike are being abused on daily basis and for some, the abuse has pushed them into depression.

If you are in a relationship where one partner is abusing you, for your own sake it is important you speak before it degenerates into depression for you. if you are already depressed because of what your spouse does to you, it is also very important for you to speak up so that you don’t kill yourself.

Sometimes some of us don’t understand that what we say have so much weight on the actions of others around us. We have forgotten that when we speak, it is almost like physically hitting people. In fact, speaking is sometimes worse because of the long term effects they may have. Someone can be beaten and the bruises will heal in a few days or weeks. But when you say certain things to some people, they just never forget for the rest of their lives.

I have written severally before now that we must speak positive words to each other. So this should be something that helps to understand the consequences of speaking negative words to each other. If you heard that a man just committed suicide, you should not just think that he woke up and decided to die. For some of them, it could have been some very terrible words from their wives and especially if they realize they can’t cope with paying bills. The issue becomes a combination of frustration, shame and hopeless in one man.

When a woman is also abused verbally by her husband, it can go farther than physically assaulting such a person. You just can tell what the impact will be with that woman. You are not in a relationship to pull each other down. Your job is to bring each other up. Lift up the soul of each other. Give each other a push in your daily pursuit. Help yourselves with your business or your challenges.

If one person seems to be lagging behind, don’t run the person down just because of that. It may be that person who’s down today and it can be you tomorrow. As a man, if you have become very rich you should not start saying your wife is no longer in your class. Spend money on her and bring her up to your taste. If you are the wife and you are richer than your husband, don’t spite him because of that.

Stop running each other down with words no matter what happens to either of you. You should never say you are up to no good or you don’t know how to do anything! Even if people have some weaknesses in them that are obvious to us, we should never use that to let them recline into relationship.

In fact, I think that one of the reasons for relationships is to erase depression, moodiness or loneliness. Isn’t that why God said it is not good for the man to be alone? And you definitely know who should be with the man. It is the woman. That means God does not want either of us to be alone or to become lonely.

Don’t let your spouse be in a relationship and still be lonely. Keep each other up in BODY, SOUL and SPIRIT. That way you can easily keep depression at bay. 

Fola Daniel Adelesi
Edible Pen.

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About the author Fola Daniel Adelesi

Fola Daniel Adelesi is a professional public speaker who also trains other speakers. He's a highly engaging training facilitator and he holds his large audience spell bound when speaking at gatherings. Apart from his several platforms which include banks, insurance companies and religious organizations where he facilitates trainings, he has been a part of some national television shows and he spoke so intelligently. He's an author, business consultant and highly skilled master of ceremony with excellent poise and diction. He was on the Debaters TV reality show season 1, he presented 'You Can' on Radio Continental in 2011 and he did motivational segments on Galaxy TV from Dec 2008 to August 2009. Fola Daniel has authored at least 5 books including ‘Writing Business Proposals,’ ‘The Mentoring father’ and ‘Get up and hit that goal.’ He talked about Social Media on - An ICT Show on Lagos Television from August 2015 to late 2016. He’s a regular guest on some national tv platforms (including Channels TV and Television Continental) and a delight to their audience. He trained as a communications professional, works as a business consultant and was also trained at Lagos Business School in collaboration with Google as a Digital Business Manager. He is the President and CEO of the Edible Pen Group.

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