Independence is not isolation | © Fola Daniel Adelesi

Just like a country gets independence from another nation and wants to stand on its own as a sovereign nation, some people think that real independence is about being completely isolated from the person you are seeking independence from. You find teenagers who want to live their lives without the interference of parents or guardians and you find some adults who claim to be independent and having nothing to do with anyone.

You should never mix independence up and think that it will mean you are totally on your own without any connection to anyone. Many of us want to be free. We want to live our lives the way we like it. We don’t want control of any sort from anyone at any time.

I think you may need to come to terms with the fact that it is dangerous to not have control of any sort. When you are without control then you will be heading for destruction. Take a look at the apprentices that you find around you. When they go to a person to learn a skill, they request to do what we, in Nigeria, call freedom. This freedom is usually a small ceremony certifying that the person involved has learnt the skill and can now start his own business in the same line.

Although this person has done ‘freedom’ that allows him or her to stand alone as a business person, the really wise ones will not just leave their former masters and go away forever. They know that there are times when their former masters will be too busy to handle the business requests he or she might be getting. At such points, the reasonable masters will transfer some of those jobs to people who learnt under them and were of good behaviour.

What can you learn from that? This person has gained independence and is not under any obligation to go back to that former master. But through ignorance some of them stay away completely and never learn or benefit what they could still have benefitted from other people around them.

It does not matter what you do right now that requires independence. You should admit that there must be some inter dependence at some point for you to live a balanced life. If you truly understand your independence, it does not in any way mean cutting off everyone around you. You will be able to make your choices. You can do as you deem fit but it will also be very wise to seek counsel.

The moment you start thinking that independence means isolation, you would have made so many avoidable mistakes before you realize it. I think you need to start reviewing your relationships right now. Start thinking about the relationships you cut off just because you thought you needed to be independent. Check to see, and be honest, if they are relationships you still need.

I am not asking you to go to people and start begging for what they have or what they can get for you. They don’t have to pay your bills. Life feels good when you can make things happen on your own but there will be times when you will need other people. If you cut them off now just because you want independence, you will turn out to be like a man in the desert with no help.

You independence is good and you need to maximise it but you should also not think that it is about being isolated. You will always need people now and later in life.

Fola Daniel Adelesi
President/CEO,
Edible Pen.

Mobile:     +234 (0)803 416 3006
Business:  +234 (0)809 972 7293
www.foladaniel.org
www.ediblepen.org
info@foladaniel.com
fola-daniel – Skype
@foladaniel – Twitter
www.facebook.com/foladanieladelesi
www.youtube.com/user/foladaniel

Edible Pen » Public Speaking | Business Development and Management Training | Business Proposals | Consulting | Blog Training | +234 (0)803 416 3006 |info@ediblepen.org

My books are now available on www.lulu.com/spotlight/foladaniel Please go there to buy. Thank you!

About the author Fola Daniel Adelesi

Fola Daniel Adelesi is a professional public speaker who also trains other speakers. He's a highly engaging training facilitator and he holds his large audience spell bound when speaking at gatherings. Apart from his several platforms which include banks, insurance companies and religious organizations where he facilitates trainings, he has been a part of some national television shows and he spoke so intelligently. He's an author, business consultant and highly skilled master of ceremony with excellent poise and diction. He was on the Debaters TV reality show season 1, he presented 'You Can' on Radio Continental in 2011 and he did motivational segments on Galaxy TV from Dec 2008 to August 2009. Fola Daniel has authored at least 5 books including ‘Writing Business Proposals,’ ‘The Mentoring father’ and ‘Get up and hit that goal.’ He talked about Social Media on Info.com - An ICT Show on Lagos Television from August 2015 to late 2016. He’s a regular guest on some national tv platforms (including Channels TV and Television Continental) and a delight to their audience. He trained as a communications professional, works as a business consultant and was also trained at Lagos Business School in collaboration with Google as a Digital Business Manager. He is the President and CEO of the Edible Pen Group.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.