There are many people who have started on a good note but starting out on a good note is not just enough. Yes, you have started that business but you are already thinking about backing out. You have enrolled in school but you don’t seem to like the faces of the teachers or lecturers and now you are planning to back out. You imagined so many good things and that has led you into thinking about marriage. You have only gone a few months into the marriage and you are thinking about backing out. Do you think that those who can today boast about being in marriage for more than 30 years or even 40 to 50 years had it all rosy? They had their days of silent wars around the house! They had their fair share of disagreement but they managed everything well and stayed on. I know these challenges you are facing can be so discouraging but have you considered the fact you need the faith to hang on much more than the guts to quit?
People can decide to back out when things are tough but if you back out at every moment when things are tough, you will never amount to much. At the end of your life, you will only have a robust profile showing how many times you just could not hang on. Your profile will show you as someone who seems to have a lot of experience with quiting in the moments of challenges rather than facing the challenges.
When I was in school I honestly thought about dropping out of school. The teachers sometimes did not help matters but rather than backing out, I stayed on until it was over. When I also went for the compulsory one year service for graduates in Nigeria, I felt like running away especially becuase I also served in Sokoto, a Northern state in Nigeria which is known for being very hot apart from the fact that it is the seat of the caliphate. Whenever it was cold it would be extremely cold and when it was hot it would be extremely hot. Blowing breeze with a lot of sand was a common site over there and at some point I felt I could actually back of this service without anyone holding me back. I really needed the faith to stay until the programme was over and at the end of the day that was were I met my wife.
Your own case may not have presented you with a spouse or may not be presenting you with a spouse but you need to think more about finishing up rather than quiting on everything. I know there people who do not like to be stressed but if you are ever going to succeed at anything, you will have to put up with certain things you don’t like. When a woman is told that she is pregnant, especially within the context of marriage, she will be very happy because she wants a baby. Although she does not like pains, she will have to bear pains for a while until the baby is born. Sometimes, the pains you feel are the proofs that the baby is growing. It is also the same in life. You want certain results but you do not bargain for the stress that come with getting those results. If you really want that result then you must look more at the results than the pains or the pressure.
Thinking more about what you want at the end of the day will give you more faith to hang on or to stay on course. When you think about how getting that degree can give you a better chance in life, you will be encouraged to stay on. When you think about how that business can grow and put good food on your table, you will be encouraged to stay on rather than backing out. If you also seek to understand that spouse of your and allow her or him get to understand you, you will eventually have a long and sweet relationship. Your love can also grow stronger as you grow older!
It will always be your responsibility to build your faith to stay on. And I will suggest you build your faith to stay on by thinking of the following:
1. What got you started in the first place?
2. Think about the passion with which you started.
3. Focus on the result you are expecting.
4. Always remember that challenges were created to stop you from reaching the goal.
5. Quitting everything means you are a failure.
You obviously do not want to be seen as a failure and when you bear these things in mind, the faith to stay on will be built. At the end of the day, you would not have just stayed on, you would have won the prize for staying on. Hang on in there and keep strengthening your faith until you expected result is in yournhands! You can if you will!
Fola Daniel Adelesi
+234 (0)803 416 3006
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